Love Wins

Love Wins.

This phrase has stuck with me since I was in college. I attended a non-denominational church when I lived in Grand Rapids, MI and they handed out Love Wins stickers. It was a megachurch, so they were all over town, and this was what I would call their mantra.

It seems obvious what the phrase actually means, but at the time I don’t think it really resonated with me, or was as obvious, because I have come to realize I’m just now truly understanding what the word LOVE means. 

So why is Love Wins on my mind these days?

The other day my partner and I were having a conversation and I apologized to him for not showing up for him over the course of several weeks. I had been going inward because there were old triggers and patterns that I noticed were surfacing, so I was emotionally distancing myself from him as I focused on this healing work.

It felt right for me to focus on healing this part of me because I knew it was a massive shift that needed to take place in order for me to show up more fully in my relationships (I believe I need to fill up my cup in order to show up for others). However, as I was coming out of this space and feeling better, I realized I was feeling guilty for not “showing up” in our relationship.  

At one point when we were talking about what I was experiencing, he just looked at me and said, “Love Wins, babe.”

He was right. In that moment, love was winning in a lot of ways. His love for me hadn’t changed even though I was taking all this time to just be alone, I was moody and short with him, I wasn’t as conversational, I wasn’t as cuddly or affectionate and just wanted to be a bump on a log for a little while.

And LOVE won because I showed myself LOVE by choosing to go inward.

You see, there was a time when I wouldn’t have taken that time to heal.  I had no idea why it was important to heal emotional trauma, and truthfully, I didn’t know how. Actually, I was so naïve, I didn’t even know I had emotional trauma!

I would have continued operating on autopilot in my life. Running around, doing more and more, forgetting quickly the emotions that were surfacing because I was so busy. And honestly, probably subconsciously running on purpose so I didn’t need to feel what was actually coming up. Suppressing. Ignoring. Just plain ole’ dismissing the wounds of the inner child that were asking for healing.

What a powerful reminder my partner gave me that day by reminding me that Love Wins.

And how beautiful is the timing of this phrase popping into my consciousness again!? We are facing a global pandemic and I think it’s safe too say that we could all use the reminder that Love Wins.

Emotions are being triggered as we social distance, homeschool, and adjust to working from home (or maybe not working at all). Loneliness, stress and anxiety are at all time highs. We have fears of getting sick every time we go out in public just to do “normal” things we used to do without ever fearing we might be putting our lives at risk. Global leaders are being asked to make decisions that no one has ever had to make before. We are facing times of volatility, complexity, uncertainty and ambiguity.

But yet, we still feel the need to bash and criticize others decisions, talk down to others, physically and emotionally abuse others, judge, shame, make others feel guilty, carry resentment, and resist forgiveness. 

Why is this? Why do we choose such crappy reactions, when we have the opportunity in every single moment to choose Love? Love feels good. Guilt, shame and judgment do not.

Now I know that there are so many people who are choosing love right now. I have heard and seen so many amazing stories where humanity is rising and coming together to support and help others. It’s so beautiful to witness!

Here’s the thing though. My consciousness is CHOOSING to surround myself with stories of love vs ones of fear. I am choosing to forgive, not pass judgment and to be a little kinder. This is my choice to choose LOVE, and you have the same one. Those that are living in love are CHOOSING love because love is a choice.

Love is the answer. We can’t forget that. Now more than ever we need to be spreading love. 

How can you be a little kinder today? Who can you forgive? What emotional patterns have you been noticing recently that are your invitations for healing? How can you help others? How can you shift your mindset to be more positive? What stories are you telling yourself that are holding you back from living in love? What experiences are you ruminating on that continue to bring you suffering?

Love wins, friends. Love freaking wins. <3