STAND TRUE

I was recently in conversation with a new friend who had come into my life and I was telling them about a recent workshop I’d attended. The workshop really resonated with me in a deep way and I felt some shifting happening in my heart around a block I’ve had, so I I was so excited to tell this new friend about my experience and some of the feelings and revelations I felt during the workshop. As we began talking, it led us down a path of discussing my lifestyle choices. What happened next caught me by surprise and left me feeling some sadness, anger, and defensiveness.  

Without going into great detail about the conversation, since this isn’t what the post is about, I was being shamed, judged and mocked for my choice of lifestyle; from my healthy food choices, to my spiritual practices to using alternative medicine to heal. All in a matter of minutes, I felt I was being torn apart for my choices and way of being, and I became speechless (literally). Now I’m sure this person would deny they were shaming, judging or mocking me, and I want to believe this wasn’t their true intent, but this is how they made me feel even if it wasn’t the intent.

I also want to mention, this is the first time this has ever happened to me, so I wasn’t fully prepared in how to respond.

However, there was an indescribable calmness I felt inside which gave me confidence to fully embrace where this was headed.

My old mindset would have sat there and probably started arguing with the person or getting all caught up on the conversation after we said our goodbyes. Sending my body into fight-or-flight because of the egoic stories I would have created in my head. I might have completely shut down and never actually voiced how I felt and cowered back for fear of even more rejection if I shared what was really on my mind.

Now I would be lying if I didn’t admit my heart started to close a little, but I kept repeating in my heart, “Stay open. Choose love. Speak up.” I was also reminding myself this person knew no different than what they actually believed.  

I took several deep breaths while the person was talking and kept reminding myself to come from a place of love.

Instead of getting all upset, I decided to use this person as a mirror to help me heal a fear, block or limiting belief I needed to release.

So this post is about what this person triggered in me. A trigger that needs healing and a trigger I’m committing to releasing. And it’s about how I found beauty in this temporary pain in my heart.

Here’s my reflection.

As this person was sharing their viewpoints, I sensed they had a fear of being different. So I asked myself, does this resonate with me, and if so, how can I use this as a mirror and reflection to my own blocks around being “different”?

I realized that I could indeed relate to this fear of being different.

You see, there are parts of me I hold back and hide in certain situations for fear of being seen or rejected. There are times when I’m not embracing my true essence and standing true in who I am, who I have become and where my life is headed. This also aligns to some of the physical ailments I’ve experienced according to Louise Hay in her book, You Can Heal Your Life. If you haven’t read this book, I highly recommend it. She talks about how our unprocessed emotions and mental state create blocks in our body and can manifest physically -- really interesting stuff if you ask me.

This fear of rejection and being seen is not anything I wasn’t already aware of, but is definitely something I believe God is encouraging me to release, especially after this experience and other synchronistic signs I’ve received.

I’ve never felt more comfortable and confident in my body, but I know there is still work to be done. In my heart, it feels right to me to pursue this life path; eating the way I do, healing through alternative medicine, expanding my spiritual practices in many directions, and in turn, sharing this knowledge with the world as a speaker, teacher and coach.

I know in my heart with confidence, that I’m on the right path, and know that as I continue to release my blocks, fears and limiting beliefs, expand my own knowledge, and put myself out there, I could be seen as “different.” But I’ve come to realize, that’s ok, because we’re all on our own journey of self-discovery.

Let’s go back to my fear of rejection because I’ve talked about this in previous posts and on my show, Light as a Feather.

I discovered at a Tony Robbins conference about a year ago, I had a fear of rejection if I were to share my opinions, thoughts or beliefs. Now this was a subconscious fear I had until the moment when Tony led us through this breakthrough exercise. I’ve now come to realize, this fear had been holding me back from living in alignment with my purpose and pursuing my mission, and is now something I’ve been releasing.

As I become more comfortable and confident in who I am and move into this career, I know my beliefs won’t resonate with everyone. And like I said above, that’s ok. Someone else’s journey is not my journey, so I shouldn’t cower or hold back because of someone else’s beliefs, fears, blocks or limiting beliefs. And you shouldn’t either.

There’s no judgement in their journey vs mine vs someone else’s. There is no right or wrong path. They are who they are, and I am me. My motto is, “you do you.”

Also know, more times than not, their actions aren’t about you. It’s about them.

But use them as a mirror to yourself so you can heal. At some point, be thankful for the experience and how it opened your eyes to something you may have been closed off to, scared to look at or resistant to let go of.  

All that being said, there needs to be mutual respect by all of us for each other’s life path.

After this conversation, I was sitting in silence talking to God and asking for guidance. I heard a whisper that said, “the Upanishads” in the back of my head, which funny enough, had come up in conversation earlier in the day with someone else. So I walked to my bookshelf and picked up the Upanishads.

When I picked up the book, I said a prayer asking to be guided to the right page or verse that would support me during this time. I spontaneously opened the book and it just so happened to be in the middle of the Mundaka Upanishad. And specifically the verse that says this.

Like two golden birds perched on the selfsame trees,

Intimate friends, the ego and the Self

Dwell in the same body. The former eats

The sweet and sour fruits of the tree of life

While the latter looks on in detachment.

As long as we think we are the ego.

We feel the attached and fall into sorrow.

But realize that you are the self, the Lord of Life, and you will be freed from sorrow.

When you realize that you are the Self,

Supreme source of light, supreme source of love,

You transcend the duality of life

And enter into the unitive state.

(from the translated version by Eknath Easwaram)

How beautiful is this?! And how fitting for this to be the page I opened to and the verse my eyes went to on the page.

Of course I continued reading until the end of the chapter, and as I was reading I had a strong sense of appreciation for the reminder to detach, to free myself from sorrow and pain and know that I’m a source of light and love.

Friends, today I encourage you to never shy from honoring your soul, your true essence, your divine path because of other’s opinions and beliefs.

What do you desire? What do you deeply yearn for? I’m not asking what others want for you. I’m asking what YOU want? What YOU believe.

If you’re on, or beginning, your path of self discovery, pursuing a new passion or mission, you will come in contact with people who have doubts and question your path and decisions. They will say things and take actions towards you to try to convince you otherwise. They won’t want you to change because they’re comfortable and don’t like this new unfamiliar territory. They may say things that will make you want to cower back into your cocoon, your safety zone, but I encourage you to stand strong and let your wings soar.

Only you know what is best for you, so I encourage you to rise up with confidence. If in your heart the path you’re on feels right, then continue to pursue it with strength, grace and compassion. If it doesn’t, never forget it’s never too late to turn around.

Please, know you’re not alone. It’s so important to surround yourself with cheerleaders. Find a tribe who will support you. Always know, I will support you.

And remember, we all have our own experiences that shape our conditioning, beliefs and values, so always approach others with kindness and compassion. Always choose love. Be open to hearing other’s opinions and practice compassionate communication. Communication consists of our actual words, tone and inflection, and body language, so be mindful of all these components when we’re communicating with others.

I’m so grateful for this experience because it reminded me to spread my wings and fly. To fly with confidence, grace and ease into the unknown knowing there will always be experiences that will try to knock me down. I believe when we’re on the path of pursuing our divine purpose and in alignment, we will receive the light, and the love of God, and that will always be enough.

Stand true in who you are. Proudly speak your truth. Be proud of your journey. And pursue what lights your heart on fire. The world needs you to rise.

There is always Something Beautiful, you beautiful, radiant and loving souls.